My previous New Years Eve wasn't any different than the ones before it had been. I worked that day, came home exhausted and didn't even try to make any "new year, new me", or your typical lose weight, drink water, be kinder resolutions, etc.
Life had started to fall into the same old routine, just like every other year. It was kind of dull, monotone, just the same repetitive lifestyle day after day.
Get up early, work, eat, sleep.
I still struggled with the bleak depression of losing my dad the two years before, my mind dwelled on the thought, making the days feel a little darker. I didn't know how to overcome those feelings.
I didn't really enjoy my job. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't anything that would get me anywhere. I still remember the cold day in February that I decided to quit working fast food. I was 20 years old, why was I still stuck in a drive thru day after day? I had worked there since I was sixteen, I wasn't sure what to do next, but it was so exhilarating putting in my two weeks notice thinking I wouldn't ever go back. It was a silly little thing to put behind me, and it didn't seem very huge or life changing, but the new attitude I decided to put on changed my life was. All I could think was I want to be happy, I want to experience life with a new perspective.
It was exciting to have so much free time on my hands. I could workout whenever I wanted, go out for coffee with friends, deep clean my little house, sleep in on days I had stayed up a little to late. My relationship with my husband became stronger, we ate more homemade meals and spent more time together. We began taking little weekend trips to the beach, road trips with his family, taking little spur of the moment dates. We visited parts of the world other than our little corner of Texas. The keys in Florida, Missouri, Costa Rica and different islands of the Bahamas. We did more photoshoots together. We bought our first "just for fun" car. I started helping make pies in a bakery a few days a week, it was stress free and with a little group of enjoyable people. I began thoroughly browsing Pinterest, trying new crafts and recipes. We visited new churches, met new friends.
But mostly of all these things, I began to pray more. I had put God aside to often in my life, throwing him on the back burner. Why would I focus on bad things, when I could be thanking God for the good things? It made all those little inconveniences in life look so small.
Life was good.
Aside from all that, one of the very most life changing events happened on an early morning of September 23rd. I found out I was pregnant with our sweet little son. I had never felt such a surging excitement go through my entire body until the moment those little pink lines showed up, bright as day on that pregnancy test. I cried tears of happiness, and thanked God over and over. I cried again when the ladies at the pregnancy center assured me it was real, then I cried the rest of the day until my husband came home from work and I told him the news. My little boy is not born yet, but he has already changed me so much for the better. I already no longer feel so selfish. His sweet little wiggles inside me remind me daily of the miracles God can put in your life. This little baby has taught me just how fervently you can love a human soul more than your own, how feverishly protecting a mothers heart can be. How dearly I love my husband when he talks to my growing belly every day, as he daydreams about having a son to teach and enjoy life with. He is our little heavenly angel, and couldn't have come at a more perfect time then now.
2017 was a very refreshing, eye opening year for me. I learned so much, I grew a new perspective. I found out that life is what you make it, happiness is a choice. You will love better if you choose not to be bitter. That you can overcome grief and pain. True, it never always goes away, but you can learn to cope with it, and be grateful for the love you experienced and memories you carry with you.
This New Years Eve again I didn't make any resolutions. But I intend on continuing to choose happiness and to enjoy life with a daily new and positive perspective.
Costa Rica Photos Recap
The Bahamas Recap
Remington Chase Annoucement & Gender Reveal
Excited and thankful for whats to come!